The Elephant in the Room
Who we’re still not talking about when we talk about the Atlanta shootings.
Let’s have a hard conversation.
Many of us in the Asian American and Pacific Islander community just celebrated AAPI Heritage Month. For me, it was a powerful month of reflection, honoring our histories and cultures, and highlighting those who came before us.
Every event I attended last month made a point to acknowledge the tragic Atlanta shootings that occurred just over 1 year ago. But like many of the gatherings over this past year, this is where the conversation about Atlanta too often stops — a brief mention, a solemn nod, and we move on to business. This is concerning.
As heavy as this season has been in the midst of increased anti-Asian hate during the pandemic, we must confront the context in which the Atlanta shootings occurred — the illicit massage industry.
The humanity and dignity of the women who were murdered must rise above all. Yet when we avoid the tougher conversation about the illicit nature of the businesses in the backdrop of the tragedies, we protect the group of men who too often perpetrate violence against women in these settings — the sex buyer. This cannot continue, but unless we talk about it, then I’m afraid it will.
Illicit massage businesses (IMBs) are literally everywhere. These businesses put on the façade of a legitimate massage establishment to facilitate commercial sex operations. There are currently over 11,000 IMBs operating in all 50 states. For comparison, that’s more storefronts than KFC and Wendy’s combined.
Who are the sex buyers? A 2018 report classified individuals who buy sex weekly or monthly as “high-frequency buyers.” This group makes up roughly 25% of total active sex buyers, but they account for nearly 75% of the transactions in the marketplace. And what did this group of high-frequency buyers list as their favorite venue to buy sex? Illicit massage businesses.
Most research shows that sex buyers generally reflect the demographics of their surrounding communities, but an important distinction is that high-frequency buyers are predominantly males who are more likely to earn $100,000 or more annually. The anti-trafficking organization Polaris analyzed activity on Rubmaps, the most popular IMB sex buyer review site, and found those participating on the site skew “significantly more Caucasian, wealthier, and older than the general internet population.”
In contrast, the overwhelming majority of women working in the US illicit massage industry are Asian immigrant women. The vast majority are from China, with a smaller minority being from South Korea, Thailand, and Vietnam. Many of the women in IMBs have unstable immigration status, lack work authorization, have massive debt, and speak limited English.
Let’s make this clear: women in the illicit massage industry — whether trafficked, exploited, there by choice or circumstance — are almost exclusively Asian immigrant women experiencing an intersection of social, economic, and political vulnerabilities. While the sex buyers driving this illicit economy are primarily older white men with the added protection of a US passport and disposable income. Whichever privilege you want to address — race, gender, class, citizenship, employability — the sex buyer has the monopoly on power in this industry relationship.
If this power imbalance is not extreme enough to raise concern, then online comments from sex buyers about IMBs should. Sites like MPReviews and Rubmaps are popular sex buyer review sites. A subscription and a few clicks unveil a world of racism, objectification, and toxic ignorance. Women are commodified, body parts are rated. The reviews are misogynistic and full of condescending language. This is the flagrant dehumanization that is often the precursor to violence. As survivors of the commercial sex trade have repeatedly voiced, violence is not the exception, it’s the rule. To the sex buyer, it’s clear that Asian women in IMBs are mere objects to be consumed and disposed. Or in the words of the Atlanta shooter, “eliminated.”
Now, is every sex buyer a murderer? No. But to present them as simply benevolent customers purchasing sex like a sandwich on their lunch break is ludicrous. While sex buyers use sites like MPReviews to brag about their experiences at IMBs, these sites must be called out for what they truly are — an online library of anti-Asian hate.
For those of us in the AAPI community who want to prevent the next Atlanta, and more recently, the murders in New Mexico, we need to address the nature of the illicit massage industry and the sex buyers who drive this market. If we want to continue advocating for solutions, whether it’s education, legislative reform, or increased community-based support, then we must be willing to engage the full scope of the problem, no matter how uncomfortable that conversation may be.
So, as we continue to cope, commemorate, and organize, let’s address the elephant in the massage parlor. If we don’t, then the women on the margins of our community will continue to pay the price.
